Welcome everybody to the introduction
Hopefully I’ll explain it all through my induction
Building a new existence through self seduction
There’s no time now for self destruction
Compiling the knowledge for instruction
Eliminating the extra work through deduction
Now it’s time to begin the inner construction
First finding all the hindering walls by deduction
Then knocking down all those obstructions
And leveling off all the reductions
Finishing my new existence by conduction
Forgetting the time of the alien abduction
© 2011 Michael Yost 12/03
Inhaling yesterday’s memory.
Her scent’s lingering long.
Sprawled naked on her silken robe
She rose early and now she’s gone
The nightstand held a note for me
I smiled as I read
The evening was nice, please feed the cat
Don’t forget to make the bed.
© 2011 Michael Yost 08/01
A farmer had 5 female pigs. Times were hard, so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them. At the fair, he met another farmer who owned five male pigs. After talking a bit, they decided to mate the pigs and split everything 50/50.
The farmers lived sixty miles apart, so they agreed to drive thirty miles each and find a field in which to let the pigs mate.
The first morning, the farmer with the female pigs got up at 5 A.M., loaded the pigs into the family station wagon, (which was the only vehicle he had) and drove the thirty miles.
While the pigs were mating, he asked the other farmer, “How will I know if they are pregnant?”
The other farmer replied, “If they’re lying in the grass tomorrow morning, they’re pregnant. If they’re in the mud, they’re not.” The next morning the pigs were rolling in the mud, so he hosed them off, loaded them into the family station wagon again and proceeded to try again.
This continued each morning for more than a week and both farmers were worn out.
The next morning he was too tired to get out of bed. He called to his wife, “Honey, please look outside and tell me whether the pigs are in the mud or in the grass.”
“Neither,” yelled his wife, “they’re all in the station wagon and one of them is honking the horn.”
The sheer curtains that opened up to the evening air
Helped diffuse the hanging flatulent tremors with ease
My normally clean conscience since I inadvertently allowed
The ambrosia escape from under the comforter.
© 2012 Michael Yost 03/19
Lazy eye turns and I see double
Tired eyes close, the start of the trouble
Drifting away, sleep seals my work
Minutes later, a sudden jerk
Awake now and ready to start
Writing half lines within my heart
It’s a price I pay with new meds
Wonder if it’s worth, sleeping instead
© 2012 Michael Yost 1/15
Posted in Poetry
Tagged Anxiety, Choices, Confusion, Consequences, Depression, Dreams, Drugs, Expectations, Faith, Fear, God, Humor, Michael Yost, New Meds, Poetry, Wonder, Writing